[personal profile] ravenclawwit
So I feel the need after last night's episode of True Blood (4x11 "Soul of Fire) to just have my rant out about how this season has gone. You are forewarned that this will be full of spoilers so if you haven't watched the whole season up to and including last night's ep, read ahead at your own risk.

I really hated this episode. True Blood has been a chore to watch this season. There are just way too many really obnoxious story lines, and as evidenced by tonight's episode, they never end. The whole Marnie/Witches thing was the worst thing that ever happened to this show.

dis bitch

Actually the only story I found remotely interesting tonight was the Alcide/Sam/Marcus/Debbie/Luna drama. Interesting that Alcide killed Marcus. Does that make him the new Pack Master? Or does it mean that he's a werewolf outcast now for killing one of his own? And Luna can stay. We like her and she makes us like Sam again, so that's good.

At least Tommy is really dead though. He was dragging the show down for awhile, and then I lost all taste for him when he basically raped Luna and the show pretended non consensual sex was oh so excusable since poor Tommy has had such a hard life. Wah.

Anyways, here's my True Blood wishlist for next season:

1. Let's be done with witches. For real. I like Jesus, but if he has to be sacrificed so that this obnoxious plot, with the many plot holes, inconsistencies, and general stupidity it has introduced can be expurgated, so be it.

2. Right. We get it. Sookie and Eric have sex. On every available surface. Every hour that they are concurrently awake. And sometimes even when they're not. I'm not a prude and a little gratuitous sex is a good thing, otherwise I never would have started watching TB, but when it gets to the point where every sex scene feels like you've seen it 20 times before, and 20 minutes of every episode are devoted to soft focus Eric/Sookie "skinemax" shenanigans, it gets old. And this is from someone who couldn't wait for Eric and Sookie to get together.

3. Andy. I used to like Andy. Let's bring back the Andy that we all liked. You know, the guy who was sort of bumbling but a generally competent police officer, who didn't really have any story lines of his own, but occasionally popped up in other people's plots to say amusing stuff and make other people look both smarter and dumber at the same time (that's a real talent). That guy. He was alright.

4. Fairies. This was a plot I actually used to be interested in. Up until it was covered for the first 20 minutes of episode 401, and then promptly dropped (utterly wasting Gary Cole in the process, I might add) for the rest of the season. Now they're going to bring it up again, but unless they're going to actually do it justice instead of just shamelessly squandering some more of America's finest character actors (Gary fucking Cole, ffs), they should just let it go.

5. Pacing. Are they filming True Blood in real time now? Wtf is going on? In last night's episode, Jesus said he was about to perform the ritual, and then we cut away to some other bullshit, and then FIFTEEN FUCKING MINUTES later we come back and Jesus is just starting to cut into his arm. Just what the doodly fuck has he been doing all that time? His taxes? This isn't fucking 24. Condense shit like every other TV show.

6. Dear True Blood, if you never utter the words "werepanther", "Crystal", or "Hot Shot" again, neither will we. *maintains stony silence*

7. Tara. Stop. Just stop. Stop making Tara's life into a steadily increasing crucible of torment, under which any other mortal would've surely blown their brains out by now. It's getting ridiculous. Ridiculous even for a show about Vampires, werewolves, shifters, fairies, and witches. Come the fuck on.

Ok I'm done ranting. And I do still love this show because I know how great it can be, I just wish the writers would steer it back on course. Here's hoping for season 5, since I'm sure none of these problems will be solved in the season finale.
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September 2012

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